


Cradle and All

by Rainebelle



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Baby Fic, Canon Compliant, F/M, Love Triangles, Mom clarke, Romance, Slow Burn, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-28
Updated: 2016-10-01
Packaged: 2018-08-18 09:16:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8157043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainebelle/pseuds/Rainebelle
Summary: wells/clarke/bellamy love triangle. A mostly canon story about Clarke as a mom. Hope you enjoy.





	1. At the beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, this is my first published fic. It is totally unbeta'd. All the mistakes are my own, but I hope you enjoy it anyway. I am terrible at summaries, but this is a story about Clarke loving Bellamy and Wells in two very different ways and trying to navigate that while still loving someone else very close to her. I appreciate you stopping by and reading this monster, I would love comments and kudos, and you can find me on tumblr @ autumnessprime  
> \- Autumn

“Clarke!” the voice snapped her out of her trance. She had been gazing out the window in the direction of a young girl, probably no older than eight or nine. The idea of what such a young child must have done to deserve such a fate pierced through her as she turned to answer the call of her name.  
She was faced with a long tan face, freckles sprawled against the bridge of his nose and cheeks, made darker by the sunlight of their first summer on the ground. When they had first landed, Bellamy and her had been nothing but adversaries. But over time, that had changed, they had become friends, or something close to it, they could confide in each other, they trusted each other.  
Dark brown eyes peeked at her from below a shaggy mane of inky curls, and then looked into the distance where she had been staring. He looked at her questioningly but apparently decided against asking her what she was staring at, he spoke, “Have we heard from the Ark?” Clarke had been in the infirmary counting medical supplies and waiting nervously by the radio, their only contact with the others still up in her old home. She hoped nobody had noticed how eagerly she had volunteered herself for the job of listening for contact, or else, if they had, had just chalked it up to her leadership mentality and not what it honestly was.  
She frowned, “No, not yet. But Raven has been sending a signal on a loop since this morning. They will hear us.” She meant it to be reassuring but she knew that Bellamy, unlike herself, was privately hoping that the Ark would never get their message and assume nobody had survived their landing. She made a mental reminder to ask him why, soon, maybe over a drink. But in the meantime she couldn’t have any negative energy going toward what she had been praying over all morning. Hear us. Hear us. Come down. We’re alive. Hear us.  
Bellamy curtly nodded and turned to leave, hunching over as to not hit his head on the low-hanging door way of her cabin on his way out. Once he had left Clarke released a breath she must have been holding their entire exchange and glanced quickly at the radio to see that it’s red light was still blinking, then back out the window again, the little girl in the field had gone, but the one on her mind stayed ever present.  
  
****************************************************************************************************************************************************  
  
That night as the delinquents sat around an enormous fire (or an enormous waste of resources, as Bellamy had so sternly put it) Clarke sat on a stump, far enough from the fire to still feel it’s warm glow, but not so close that somebody might venture to pull her in to their drinking game of Never have I ever. It was apparently Octavia’s turn as she stood up on her chair, wobbling uneasily from the sheer volume of moonshine she had consumed so far that night. Clarke watched with intrigue as she wondered what exactly Octavia was going to say she had never done. Everyone knew Octavia was the baby under the floor. Everyone had heard about her when she had been found at sixteen years old. Never having ever left their room let alone anything else, Octavia wouldn’t have been able to lay claim to achieving much of anything before they had landed on the ground three weeks ago, but she had seen Octavia running around with girls gossiping and giggling, sneaking away late at night out of her tent, making friends, becoming somebody. Octavia spoke, raising her glass like a toast and waved her hips around as she declared “Never – have – I – EVER” she stopped to ponder “SEEN HARPER NAKED”. A few girls who Clarke recognized as Harper’s friends from the Ark and two different boys all toasted their drinks and shot the liquor back as everyone else erupted into laughter, Harper’s face glowing bright red as she laughed along “Hey that cannot be true! No way this many..” She was cut off by even more laughter. The gauntlet was passed to Jasper, next. She watched amused as Jasper drunkenly spouted “Never have I ever… Been in solitary.” She watched as Octavia tipped her cup back. Clarke out a heavy sigh and downed the rest of her moonshine too, as she stood up to walk away before memories of the Ark came flooding back. She walked away from the light of the fire and stumbled meekly toward the direction of the Infirmary cabin, it had been about an hour since she checked the radio and her gut pulled her back. That was enough fun for one night. 

She kicked pebbles away as she walked, wavering along until she felt a presence behind her, and suddenly heard him speak, “Is that true? Were you in solitary?” Her eyes final focused on the figure in front of her now, and saw those same intense eyes as earlier. She gave him a light shrug and continued walking; he fell in step beside her with ease. “For what?” he pressed. Maybe it was the buzz of the alcohol in her system, maybe it was the reminder of what she had left behind on the Ark, but she felt a fire rage within her. “What the fuck is it to you?” Bellamy scoffed at that, and placed his hand on his hip, looking down at her condescendingly, “Oh what, a simple janitor from the ghetto couldn’t possibly understand your expensive, hoity-toity problems? What even constitutes a crime up there, did you wear white after labor day?” He laughed darkly at her, and before she could stop herself, she had shoved him against the wall to her cabin. “You have no idea the crime and the punishment I have witnessed firsthand. Things that put a girl under the floorboards to shame, Blake, now back off before you learn more than you ever wanted to know.” She realized she had her body fully pressed against his and when she met his eyes again where she expected to find rage, she saw something else, was it hunger? She didn’t have time to find out, exactly, because with his next breath his mouth was on hers. One hand placed firmly on the back of her neck and the other on her hip. He turned her, placing her back up against the cabin where he had just been. He pulled his mouth away from hers and pressed it to the shell of her ear, “Why don’t you make me, Griffin?” She growled conscious of too many things at once. Aware of his growing erection pressed against her hip, aware of his heart beating a tattoo against his neck, but also, aware of the blinking red light in her peripheral vision in the window next to her head. “Inside” she muttered against his hair as he was sucking on the skin of her neck.  
Clarke led the way, into the silent room, no contact yet, she thought quickly before Bellamy pushed her strongly down onto the cot she had made up for herself in the infirmary. She spent most of her time there and frequently would just crash there after a long day. She pushed herself up onto her elbows and watched him standing in front of her chastely unbuttoning his pants and sliding them down his long tan legs. He rid himself of his shirt and was on her in a blur. Maybe it was the moonshine that made everything feel like it was in fast motion, but before she could remember to dim the lights and turn herself over before things could progress any further, as she usually did when she had someone in close quarters like this, Bellamy was pulling her shirt up. And just as she feared, he stared down at her abdomen. A look that was a cross between concern and disgust crossed his face. Clarke let out a heavy sigh. In her time down on the ground, she had made up for lost time where physicality was concerned. Not seeing a human face, let alone being touched in over a year made her hungry for it when she landed, and knowing she had to be careful, had developed a routine, and had lies in place in case anyone had accidentally seen. But so far they hadn’t, and it appears she wasn’t as ready for this as she thought. She closed her eyes tightly, not wanting to meet his, she pulled her shirt back down over her stomach and began to stand and walk away, she could sleep inside tonight. Bellamy sat on the edge of the bed, “Where are you going?” Clarke didn’t have the energy for this, she picked the radio off the window sill, “to bed.” She replied. “This is your bed, Clarke, and you don’t have to leave, did I do something wrong?” Clarke rolled her eyes, what, he was just going to pretend he hadn’t seen anything. She felt tears welling up in her eyes. She had been able to push all of this aside. Focus on what’s important. This was a stupid mistake. Bellamy grabbed her hand and pulled her close to him, to where she was standing between his knees. He pushed her shirt up again, revealing a long purple scar across her middle. Jagged and angry, stretching like a sinister grin beneath her navel. He traced hi finger across it’s raised edge, “Look, you don’t have to explain this to me. I didn’t grow up on Alpha, Clarke. I know what this means. But it’s none of my business. If you want this” he motioned between them, “to stop. It stops here. We have both had too much to drink. But I don’t.. look at me Clarke.” He grabbed her gaze with her eyes, where tears had gathered, “But, I don’t want you to think this means anything, that it means I think differently of you. Think of where I came from. I grew up with my sister living in my floor, you don’t think I know there was another option? Maybe, even, a better option, I love my sister, you know that, but-” Clarke stopped him there, putting her hand up and shaking her head slowly, “Bellamy, you don’t understand… this,” she placed her hand over her scarred belly, “It doesn’t mean what you think it does… She..” Bellamy’s eyes widened, “She’s up there, Bell. She’s alive.” –


	2. my only friend was the man in the moon (and even sometimes he would go away too)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Wells on the Ark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is going to jump around quite a bit, I hope I made it easy enough to follow, this chapter takes place back on the Ark, and gives a background to Clarke and Wells.

“Would you just listen to me? Clarke!” Wells rushed hurriedly behind her down the chrome corridor. “Clarke it’s not what you think, please just-” Clarke whipped around, a look of rage burning in her deep blue eyes. “Not what I think?” she laughed deliriously tears streaming wildly down her face, leaving dark trails of day old make up behind, “Is he dead, Wells? Is my father dead?” His eyes fell to the floor, “Yes, he is. His body is floating in space right now. So I think, correct me if I’m wrong” her voice frantic “but it is exactly what I think it is.” Clarke ran away still conscious of the secret she hid beneath her sweater, trying to remember what she looked like when she ran 8 months ago. She was quickly winded and leaned against a door breathing heavily. 

  


She and Wells had been close for as long as she can remember. It wasn’t until 10 months ago that things had shifted.  
  
  
************************************************************************Ten months ago******************************************************  
  
  
Her father was under a lot of stress at work. She found him up in his study at late hours of the night, shifting through papers wildly, muttering incoherently to himself. This wasn’t the father she knew. This wasn’t the even keeled man who had saved everyone’s lives on the Ark, more than once with his genius engineering. No, this was a side of her father she had never seen. And it terrified her. As she always did, she confided in Wells, after a particularly frightening night. Clarke hadn’t been able to fall asleep after hearing her father awake again. She stood silently in the door way to his study and saw her father crying over a pile of blue prints, the harsh light from his desk lamp illuminating his hands, his nails bit bloody and clutching his reading glasses in his fist as his chest rose and fell with violent sobs. The following morning when her father slept out on their couch, exhausted from his late nights, Clarke and Wells snuck into his study. What they found, nothing could have prepared them for. Wells was as smart as anyone in their class, and although his father, the Chancellor, had predestined him for a life as a politician, Wells had a knack for science, and that was putting it lightly. After a mere hour or so of studying over her father’s notes, Wells looked up at her with tears in his eyes. Clarke's heart plummeted, waiting for what Wells had discovered, “It’s the Ark, Clarke. It’s failing. And he can’t save it.”  
  
After that day, Clarke and Wells were shaken with the fullness of the secret they held. Nearly every night after that one, Wells would message Clarke on her tablet to see if she was able to sleep, and every night she confirmed that she couldn’t. He came over and sat on her floor, the played chess silently, taking shallow breaths, as if to conserve what little oxygen remained on the Ark, hoping that whatever air they saved, they could use one day to say how they felt. But they didn’t. They fell asleep silently side by side, night after night, in terror of what they knew but couldn’t say.  
One night, a few weeks after their findings, the Ark planned to hold a dance, there was a meteor shower and excitement buzzed everywhere. As their classmates discussed what they would wear and how they were going to get banned substances snuck into the party at their cafeteria table, Clarke and Wells shared a look across the table, for the first time in what felt like an eternity, the look held something other than the fear they had been holding. In Wells eyes Clarke saw a sliver of something different. Wells and Clarke decided to go to the dance. An unspoken agreement to enjoy something, if it was the last time, or if nothing would ever be the same, they decided to go to the party. Clarke donned a black fitted dress that her mother was elated to see her slip on. “Clarke, honey, I’m so happy to see you just being a kid again. I don’t know what has gotten into you lately, but I remember being a teenager on the Ark. Have fun tonight.” Her mother smiled fondly at her, and for a split second Clarke was certain that a particular part of that sentiment was not true. I don’t know what has gotten into you lately. Clarke’s stomach felt sick but she decided to push it aside, remembering her silent promise to Wells. But the shadow of the lie didn’t leave her mind entirely.  
  
As she was putting the finishing touches on her hair, Clarke heard the doorbell ring; she took one last glance at herself. The past few weeks she had been living in her father’s sweaters and not bothering to shower until her mother started forcing her to rinse off and start representing the family well, again. She saw in her reflection that where there once was well rounded curves there were hallows and she made a mental note to remind herself to eat tonight. She slipped on her heals and walked towards her living room where Wells stood proudly, in his best suit, of course. The one he wore at his father’s inauguration after his most recent re-election this last year. He looked equally parts stunning, and stunned. His dark skin so complimented by the black of the satin in his suit jacket, which, she might add, was filled out even better than it was the last time she had seen him in it. His shoulders broadened to the point where she wasn’t sure the button would fasten this time. The look in his eyes was not subtle, and she blushed worried her mother might have caught a glimpse of Wells tongue darting out to wet his lips as he shifted from one foot to the other. She looked over and saw a smirk on her mother’s face as she slipped into the kitchen “I’m going to grab your father, you two don’t go anywhere.”  
  
“Clarke, you look…” He paused, “Unbelievably sexy.” She laughed nervously, which broke the spell as he pulled her into his chest as he had done since they were children. “You don’t look half bad yourself, you been working out?” At that he broke down laughing at the ridiculousness of her question, as she knew full well he had been doing exactly what she had these past months. A bright flash stunned them out of their laughing fit, they looked up to see her parent’s standing in the door way side by side, her father holding a polaroid camera in his hands. Clarke hadn’t seen her father in a few days and he looked like he was barely holding on by a thread. Dark circles had enveloped his eyes and the startings of a beard had grown on his face. His clothes looked disheveled and Clarke had to resist running into his arms and breaking down. Wells either knowing her too well, or sensing her unrest tightened his grip around her waist. Holding her firmly to the promise she made not only to him, but to herself. She knew her father wasn’t doing well, but seeing it just made it so much harder. “What a beautiful couple, Jake.” Her mother mused. It was no secret that Abby and Thelonious had been pushing for their children together since they were practically born, and the amusement on her face was evident, like she had won a game she had been playing at for years. Her father, despite his condition, looked suddenly at peace as he looked at the photo that developed in his hand, “yes,” he hummed, and looked up to his daughter, “beautiful.”  
  
The dance was chaos. Music blared, lights strobed and bodies bounced around them already sheened with sweat by the time Clarke and Wells had arrived. Clarke wasn’t sure what she had expected but upon arriving it became very clear to her that she had gotten herself in over her head. Immediately sensing Clarke’s apprehension Wells leaned down and whispered to her, “I sort of figured this wasn’t going to be your thing, don’t worry, I have a plan.” He beamed proudly at her before grabbing her hand tightly with his own and lead her through the crowd that reeked of sweat and alcohol. He led her down many corridors into a lower station she had never really spent much time in before, factory station. They came to a raised nook off of one of the corridors, almost like a small closet with a small round window no more than the size of a dinner plate. “These were intended to be servants quarters before they determined there wouldn’t be space for them, they were never removed from the original designs, and nobody ever really found a use for them, but when we were…” he gulped down the words he decided against saying, “when I saw some of the older blueprints your father has, I saw these, and thought, you know.” He shrugged and hunched down to fit himself into the quite literal, hole in the wall. Inside he had laid down blankets and a few pillows, she recognized them from the infirmary, she gave him a smirk, “I may have visited your mother on less than honest terms this morning in the medical wing, okay?” Clarke crawled in after him and squeezed next to him, pulling her legs to her chest. She sighed and looked out the window. Earth was perfectly framed in their view by the metal ring around the glass. It almost looked like a painting hung on the wall, before the meteors started falling. It was beautiful. Clarke sank into his side and breathed in the moment. She closed her eyes and tried to melt as far into him as she could. Focused hard on his heart beat and his breath. His smell and the feel of his warm hand running up and down her arm and shoulder. It started to feel like maybe things were going to be okay. Something about staring at the Earth made her feel at peace. Something about Wells’ heavy breath in her ear made her feel loved. His hand came up to her face, and tipped her chin up until her eyes were locked with his. Her eyes dropped down to focus on his tongue, as it wet his lips, and this time she felt it in the pit of her stomach. She felt want pooling deep inside her. Something about imminent doom made her want her best friend stronger than she ever could have imagined.  
  
Being confined in this small space should have made things difficult to make love the way they were but there was something to be said about symbolism there. Growing up on a ship floating through space confined to a metal box and only knowing loving one person, it was all too familiar. As their bodies glided against each other slick with the sweat they had accumulated, they had no fear of being caught – what were they going to do to them that could counter what they were doing to themselves. Clarke writhed beneath him, here vision blinding white as she came undone, selfishly gulping air, if it was the last of the oxygen on the Ark, she couldn’t think of a better way it could be used but to gasp his name into the void.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it! Its so hard for me, and I'm not sure why I choose to write it, because Wells is by far my favorite character but I am Bellarke until I die. so.


	3. we walk through the doors so accusing their eyes (like they have nay right at all to criticize)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once again, totally unbeta'd. If you're still reading this, and enjoying it. Thank you for sticking with me this far, I hope it just get's better from here on out. There is much more to come!

Twelve weeks ago  
  
Clarke pounded heavily on the metal door in front of her. Panting, she looked both ways down the corridor to ensure once again that she wasn’t followed. The door opened and she pushed her way in and closed it quickly behind her. Two very confused people stood in front of her. “Clarke Griffin?” the man spoke, pulling his wife behind him instinctively. Clarke smiled lightly as she caught her breath, thinking as she saw his protective action that she had made the right choice coming here. “Alex, yes, you remember me.” She said through heaving breaths, man, she was really out of shape. “Of course he remembers you honey, he was just surprised to see you here, its three in the morning, you know.” Clarke looked at Alex’s wife apologetically. “Yes, Sara, I am so sorry to barge in like this, but I promise you, that is not going to be the worst of my actions tonight,” she breathed, “unfortunately. I need to ask something of you two. Something I never should ask.” The concern grew on the couples face in unison and Sara led Clarke to their couch. They had an apartment on a lower level of the Ark. Alex Sheppard, being a physician’s assistant, made a decent wage but nothing like that of her parents who owned a three bedroom home. The Sheppard’s home was sparsely furnished, Clarke glanced around trying to find the bedrooms, to realize that there wasn’t one. She saw a handle on the wall that she was familiar with as a pull-down bed. It was a studio apartment. Her chest felt even heavier with what she was about to ask them. Sara offered her a glass of water and Clarke sipped it gratefully.  
“Clarke, I hate to say it, but you look like shit. What’s going on?” Alex asked her, crouching in front of her once she had caught her breath.  
Clarke just shook her head, “I was so panicked when I ran here, I didn’t even think of how I was going to say this, it’s just… I’m sorry but what I’m about to tell you is going to change your entire lives, and what I’m going to ask you is going to sound impossible, and if I could avoid any of this I would have, believe me. Alex, you were such a great mentor to me, I didn’t want it to be like this.” She sighed, remembering the beginning of her training under her mother. Abby Griffin was the chief of surgery on the Ark and had a small team of other doctors, some nurses and assistants in her practice. Alex was her assistant and she delegated almost all of Clarke’s training to him. But that was two years ago. Clarke was working independently with small cases that didn’t require someone better qualified - someone like Alex.  
Alex had aged since she had seen him last. He couldn’t have been a day over 35 but he had worry lines on his face that she presumed were about to become a lot more severe. She decided that she had to just put them out of their misery and tell them exactly what was happening.  
“The Ark is dying. We are running out of air and the Ark is dying. They are sending down 100 inmates to Earth as a test run to see if it is habitable. My father discovered this, and they floated him this morning. They are charging me with the same crime. I have maybe a day, maybe two left before they move me down to the prison block and a weeks before they send me to Earth.” She paused, before she delivered the final blow.  
Sara spoke, “Clarke… Clarke I’m so sorry to hear about your father.” She rested her hand on Clarke’s shoulder, yes. I definitely made the right choice. She felt Sara’s hand shake with fear, however, as the gravity of what Clarke divulged sunk in.  
“I’m sorry, but it gets worse.” Clarke stood then, and peeled off the sweater she had been wearing that hung so loosely around her frame, concealing what she had kept a secret these past 36 weeks.  
Sara gasped and Alex’s head fell. “Clarke, do they know?” she shook her head, answering his question, “You can’t... they… Clarke they will kill it.” What he said was true. She was a minor and underage pregnancy was a crime. When she had her final medical examination before being processed, they would see the obvious, and they would kill it.  
“Alex, I have to ask you. I have to.” Her eyes pleaded with him to understand her so she didn’t need to say it out loud, he dropped his head into his hands and dropped to his knees. Sara looked around frantically, still confused. Alex looked up at his wife with tears in his eyes, “she needs me to deliver that baby. Tonight.”  


**************************************************************************************************************************************************

  
Sara stood in the kitchen, hurriedly sanitizing instruments and placing them on a metal tray as Alex bustled around the house, locking and re-locking the doors. If they found her here, Alex and Sara would be floated.  
The plan was to deliver the baby via cesarean, and to keep the baby alive at all costs. Once the baby was out, Clarke would go home. She would insist on her mother providing the medical examination, her mother would see the wound, and perhaps know what it meant, but Clarke would lie and say the baby didn’t survive. Alex and Sara would keep the child. They would keep it safe and private as possible. It would draw attention but Sara could easily claim that she wanted it private and that she had Alex deliver it at home. Everything else was just details.  
Clarke laid down on their kitchen table. Alex held up a syringe and Clarke knew that wasn’t his personal medication. It was anesthetic for surgery, he had stolen it. If he had been caught he would be floated. He was risking so much for her. Suddenly Clarke shot up, she looked Sara in her eyes, and begged the question wordlessly, tears streaming from her eyes. Sara just grabbed her hand and nodded, managing a weak smile. Yes she was sure. Clarke laid back down, and ran her hands over her bump for a final time. Over the past four months that she knew she was pregnant, she had grown quite attached to this child. Wells child. She had distanced herself from him, and right about now she wished she hadn’t. He may never know the life that they had created, and she may never see it again. But she loved it with everything she had these past few months and that was going to have to be enough. She felt her body go limp as a cool serum coursed through her veins. She thought of Wells, and for a moment she forgot to hate him, as she slipped into blackness.  


**************************************************************************************************************************************************

 

She woke up covered in sweat and scratchy blankets. She began to roll off her back and onto her side when her entire body was wracked with searing pain. She almost screamed out before she heard Sara shushing her, and felt a hand pushing her sweaty hair off her face. “Clarke honey, are you awake?”  
Clarke feebly nodded, she blinked her eyes opened and was able to focus on the source of her pain. She pulled the blankets off and looked down to see herself covered in dried blood. A long cut across her abdomen stitched closed with about 20 tiny knots. The shock of what she was looking at quickly faded away and was replaced with panic, she grabbed Sara’s arm and looked at her wildly, “Is it?...” she didn’t dare mutter the next words out loud as not to curse it. Alive.  
  
Sara bit her lip and weakly smiled, and nodded, “Yes, Clarke. She is.” Clarke collapsed into tears. Crying and laughing and crying some more. Her child had survived. Her daughter.  
On cue, Alex walked out holding a bundle in his arms. Swaddled in a quilt was the smallest person Clarke had ever seen. She had witnessed plenty of births in her apprenticeship on the Ark, even premature births, but this little thing in Alex’s arms was something else. He kneeled beside Clarke and propped her daughter up so that Clarke could see her face. She was puffy and swollen but so strikingly, Wells. She had a full head of dark curly hair and her squinted eyes were almost black. Her skin was lighter than Wells, but still tinged with her father’s olive tones. Clarke was overcome. She knew that she was going to have to leave soon, and never turn back. She could not return to her daughter or else raise suspicion. She let the tears fall from her face freely and reached for her sleeping daughter. Once in her arms she felt nearly weightless and she cradled her close. She whispered in her tiny ear, “I promise you, I will find you. No matter how far you or I go, I will always come back for you. I promise.” Clarke looked up at Sara pleadingly. There was no way Clarke was going to be able to hand her off, she needed Sara to come take her before Clarke decided to stay and hide from everything. Sara heard her silent prayer, and perhaps was almost as devastated to separate the two as Clarke. But they all knew what had to be done.  
Clarke agonizingly stood from their bed and pulled her father’s sweater over her head again, leaving a different girl than she walked in. “I have to go now, baby girl. I love you.” She managed through sobs. She looked up into the faces of the two people who just saved her child’s life, standing side by side, her infant daughter in the woman’s arms, their faces all the while terrified and overcome, as any new parents should be. In the same breath Clarke wished to thank them for everything they had done, and also beg them to keep her precious girl safe. But she knew, she didn’t need to say any of it. They knew. Clarke tried to smile, and shakily began to turn around and leave the apartment, and her entire heart behind.  
“Clarke, wait.” Alex called, Clarke turned, tears still streaming down her face. “What’s her name?”  
Clarke stopped. She had wondered this to herself for many months now, and though many names had buzzed in and out of her mind, she knew then, exactly who this little girl was going to be.  
“Nova.” Clarke said.  
New.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on tumblr @ autumnessprime


	4. the piano is not firewood yet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> just a segue chapter, I hate writing these - but it had to be done, hang in there, big things are coming.

-Current day -

“Fuck.” Bellamy muttered, passing the bottle back to Clarke.   
“Yeah, I told you, more than you ever wanted to know.” Clarke brought the bottle to her lips. The small radio blinked silently between them. They sat side by side on Clarke’s makeshift bed, their backs leaning against the wall. Bellamy turned to look her in the eyes, holding her hands tightly in his own, his once intense eyes softened, “Clarke, you know she is going to make it down.” He sighed and looked away, “they all are.”  
“Bellamy, what are you afraid is going to happen when the Ark comes down? They can’t do anything to Octavia down here. They can’t punish her for laws that make no sense on the ground.”   
“But what if I committed a crime? Broke a law that would make sense anywhere?” he looked at her so broken, so afraid, he looked like a young boy.   
“What do you mean?”   
“If I tell you, you’ll think of me differently… I’m not what you think I am. I’m a monster.”   
“Bell, when you saw…” Clarke paused, swallowing hard, “when you saw my scar, and knew what it meant, did you think I was a monster?” Bellamy grabbed her face with his hands, shaking, “Clarke you know that I didn’t, you know that you’re not-” Clarke cut him off, “Not a monster? Exactly, whatever you’ve done, however bad it might be, I’m sure you had a good reason for doing it.”  
“I shot the chancellor.” Bellamy watched her face for any sign of a reaction, but it appears as if she didn’t hear him. “Clarke?”   
“I heard you, Bell, I’m waiting to hear why. You wouldn’t shoot someone who didn’t have it coming.”  
“I did it because it got me on the dropship. I did it to be with Octavia. To be selfish, Chancellor Jaha did nothing to deserve being shot.”  
“Yeah nothing, except demote you from guard to janitor for revenge. Oh, and lock your sister away for existing. OH, and floating your mother… and-” Bellamy shoved her playfully and they smiled at each other, “Okay, maybe I had a little reason…”  
“Did you kill him?”  
“I don’t know.”  
“Does Wells know?”  
“Does Wells know his child is up in space and is about to come down to Earth after he never even found out you were pregnant?”  
Clarke just emptied the rest of their liquor down her throat and shrugged, Bellamy laughed at that, too.  
It was just the kind of night that needed a little dark humor.  
*  
Clarke awoke to the sound of loud static, deafening white noise, she rolled over to get out of bed and figure out where that awful racket was coming from, but she was blocked by a body, she paused, only for a second, to admire Bellamy’s sleeping form. She remembered they fell asleep in here last night, talking and drinking. As she tried to carefully extricate herself from the bed without waking him someone burst into the cabin, “What the hell is that noise?” She heard Raven say, then freeze in the doorway, smirking at what she had walked in on. Clarke tried to begin to explain the situation but before she could her attention was redirected to the blaring sound that had brought them all together in the first place and blearily she turned her head in the direction of the sound, she walked over to the other side of the room and heard the sound coming from beneath a blanket that had been thrown haphazardly on the ground the night before. She plucked the blanket up, and found the radio. The little light blinking green. Clarke’s heart soared. Her head snapped in the direction of Raven, who had already turned tail and headed for the drop ship. Clarke turned around to wake Bellamy, and then left to follow Raven, not bothering to look back.  
*  
“Can I get everyone’s attention?!” Clarke yelled from her position, on top of a chair in the middle of the camp. “Hello! Everyone! I have something to say!”  
“HEY! EVERYBODY LOOK AT CLARKE!” Bellamy boomed. That did it. The hundred began to gather around where Clarke stood.   
“Thanks, Bell.” Clarke smiled at him, and then turned to the growing crowd in front of her, “Everybody, we have gotten contact from the Ark.” People turned to each other and murmurs spread around, “I spoke to my mother, Abagail Griffin, she says the Ark will be here within one week. They think they will have enough room on their drop ships to get everybody down.”  
“They think?!” a voice yelled from somewhere in the crowd.  
“What if they don’t?” someone else piped up.  
“I don’t know, honestly. I just know what I’ve been-”  
“Bull shit you don’t know, you’re fucking Ark royalty, are they loading Alpha station first?”  
“Honestly I-” Clarke began, before Octavia spoke up from the center of the crowd,  
“Clarke told us what she knows, use that information the best you can, just for a few days and the rest of your questions will be answered, because the Ark will be here. We can’t change anything any way, stop taking it out on Clarke.”  
Clarke smiled at the young girl, who is looking surprisingly older every day.¬  
*  
Clarke took a short hike to the nearby stream to take a bath. They could be here any day, command on the Ark told them that when they lose contact is when they know the time is close. Clarke wanted to look nice for when she saw her daughter. Also, it was her birthday. There was no way anyone else could have remembered that, what with the chaos of everything, but Clarke was just happy she remembered. Her birthday gift to herself was a well-deserved private soak in the nearby stream, made warm by the hot summer day that was rolling to an end.   
She stripped down and sunk into the water, the chill surprising her at first, but after her body had acclimated she truly began to feel grateful for her gift to herself. As she floated around, she let her mind wander. She thought about the other night with Bellamy. They had been spending a lot of time together since that night, but nothing further happened. She wondered if that would ever change. She had never really thought of him in any other way beside a partner in leading their people. Sure, she had noticed he was attractive, and maybe felt a tinge of jealousy the first few weeks watching women pile in and out of his tent, but she wondered now, if anything could happen between them. Did knowing the truth put him off? Would he avoid her once she had her daughter again?   
Clarke also thought of Wells, and how he would be coming down too. First class, no doubt. She scoffed to herself. She knew once he was here, there would be no hiding her. He would look at her, and he would know. Nova was his daughter. He had made mistakes, but he deserved to know her.  
Before her thoughts could progress any further, she was cut off. A brilliant bright light flashed in the sky, at first she thought it was just another weird Earth thing like rainbows and clouds, but upon closer inspection she realized that couldn’t be further from the truth.  
It was the Ark. And it was plummeting toward Earth.


	5. I'm glad I didn't die before I met you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> IT INTENSIFIES   
> thank you for still reading. the reception to my story has been overwhelming. I feel so encouraged to keep writing. thank you again and again for your kudos, and comments. I love you all.

Clarke scrambled to get dressed, pulling her clothes over her still wet body, and began running as fast as she could toward camp. She sprinted through the woods, and no sooner had the front gates come into view, the Ark hit the ground in a fiery blaze.   
The air was knocked from her lungs. She stutter stepped forward then lunging into a full sprint again. She flung the gates open and was faced with chaos like she had never seen. The Ark was not 100 meters from their camp and engulfed in flames, members of the 100 ran to the inferno with buckets of water, desperately pulling families out and carrying them to safety. As Clarke approached, ready to help, the events came into clear view. Bodies were strewn across the ground, numerous casualties. Clarke stopped in her tracks as if she had hit a wall, and doubled over, her heart dropped into her stomach - her daughter was in there somewhere. She remembered the promise she whispered in her ear no more than 12 week ago, and ran. She ran passed bodies on the ground, delinquents pouring water, and directly into the fire. She was going to find her baby.   
The heat was nearly unbearable. Clarke felt her hair and skin singeing as she pushed through the wreckage. There were three separate ships, and the Ark. Or, more frankly put, there was a field of burning scraps of metal and one larger scrap of metal. Clarke waged through, she began with the first drop ship, she pulled on the hatch, this ship had been evacuated already, the seats were all emptied. They wouldn’t have pulled out dead bodies, Clarke thought to herself, That could mean everyone in this ship survived. She held on to the sliver of hope that someone could have already rescued Nova as she came to the second drop ship. Everyone evacuated already. A woman and a young boy sat a few feet from the ship, Clarke ran to them, “Are you okay?” the boy was sobbing, the woman pulled up her pant leg to reveal a deep burn on her calf, possibly from a hot pipe. “I can’t walk” the woman said. Clarke couldn’t leave the woman, but she didn’t have time. Nova could still be in there. Clarke looked around frantically before her eyes landed on pair of men running toward her. On closer inspection: Bellamy. It was Bellamy and Miller. Bellamy barked “Miller, help that woman and her son back to safety, I need to keep searching!” Clarke realized that Bellamy was yelling with his full voice, for the first time she was able to hear the volume of the deafening noise of this situation. As Miller helped the lady, Bellamy leaned down to Clarke, “I don’t think she was on any of the drop ships, they were reserved.” Bought. Clarke thought. Bellamy pressed on, “She must be on the Ark, and Clarke, Raven said we don’t have long. It’s going to blow. We need to get in there now!” and with that Clarke took off, if she thought she was running before, she had no idea what she was capable of when her daughter was on the line.   
Bellamy arrived at the Ark a few seconds after Clarke did, she was frantic, running around the outside of the enormous metal ship, “HOW DO WE GET IN BELL? WHERE?” Bellamy looked determined at the Ark for a moment before turning to Clarke, “The service hatch, it should be close by.” He took off running around a bend of the Ark, he picked up his radio, “RAVEN! How do I get into the Ark from an outside service hatch!?” Raven must have spoken back, and Bellamy must have heard her because when Clarke caught up with him he was getting a hatch on the side of the Ark open.   
“Once we get in we will be in Alpha, will you be able to find your way to their room from there?”  
“I think so Bellamy, but what if they’re no in their room?”   
Bellamy turned around and grasped Clarke’s face, “I’ll find her.”   
As she climbed into the service hatch she was acutely aware of how much pain wracked her body. Her lungs ached from overuse and smoke inhalation. Her legs had been beaten from climbing over the hot metal shrapnel. Her body begged her to stop and rest, but her heart pressed her forward. A secret thread between her and her daughter pulled her into the wreckage of an Ark corridor.   
Lights hung, blinking from the ceilings, incandescent and buzzing. Wires snarled and hissed angrily on the floor. Bellamy turned around, offering a hand to ease her way in. Clarke motioned to their left, “I think it’s this way.” Bellamy nodded and they jogged down the hall. Clarke tried to stay focused on their mission, but it was truly overwhelming seeing the Ark this way. She knew it was going to fail, but she had never pictured what it would be like if it did. What it would feel like to be inside it, without any of space’s rules. The Ark on Earth was nothing she ever could have imagined. After a few more minutes of stairs and corridors, they were nearing a lower level of the Ark. The floors they had been on had already been emptied, as these people were able to afford a seat on the drop ships. Clarke heard the sound of terror approaching. As the neared the air lock that would lead them to farm station.  
People were frantic, gathering belongings, nursing wounds, searching for their children. As much as Clarke wanted to stop and help every person, she truly did, she had her mind set on her daughter. She froze in the doorway to the madness. Watching everyone, searching for a familiar face, a familiar anything. She thought hard and fast, where would Alex be? Alex would be exactly where I would be. She turned to Bellamy, “I know where Alex is.” Grabbed his hand and ran through the crowds of people who didn’t seem to be bothered. She pulled Bellamy every which way, until they reached large ceiling height glass doors that Bellamy pushed open, their sliding function not surviving the crash.   
Clarke walked through the small opening Bellamy was able to create and her eyes darted around the infirmary wing. There she saw him: Alex, and Sara. They were wildly packing medical supplies into duffle bags, and handing them to others who were running off with them, taking them off the Ark to go help the wounded.   
“Alex!” Clarke cried, she ran to him, hoping that when he turned around, Nova would be in his arms. She was not so lucky.  
“Clarke, my god!” Alex cried back. Grabbing her up in his arms.  
“How are you, how did every-” Alex began, before Sara intervened,   
“Clarke honey, she is safe, she was on the first drop ship. When we heard that they were buying spots we knew we weren’t going to be able to get down safely.”  
Clarke sighed, relieved but confused, “How did you get her on the ship?” she asked.  
Sara and Alex shared a glance, and Alex spoke. “Wells. We gave her to Wells, Clarke. I’m sorry but it was the only way.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and Comments always appreciated.   
> find me at tumblr as always @ autumnessprime


	6. Tell the truth even if your voice shakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back on the Ark, between Abby and Wells, this story is canon-compliant but not everything is exactly as it happened on the show or in the book. I tried to remember all the right terms for everything but mostly I'm just loving every moment of writing this so again, thank you for coming this far. please hang on for more to come, I'm writing a new chapter tonight, I wrote everything before here in about 2 days so I'll try to keep it coming. 
> 
> \- Autumn

Three days ago: Ark

 

People had been pounding on Thelonious’ door all day, since the announcement of the exodus that morning. Now everyone on the Ark knew, they were going to Earth, and space was limited. It was announced that the children, engineers, farmers, pregnant women, and government would board first. However, as Wells sat in his father’s office, trying to maintain the calm while Thelonious was off doing whatever was needed of the chancellor, it became apparent in the Project Exodus mission plan on his father’s tablet, that that wasn’t the case. They were practically selling the seats on the drop ships. Not only with money, but influence. Giving seats to whoever could offer them the most.   
Disgusted with this, Wells pushed the tablet away. Assured of his own seat on a ship, he idly considered giving it to someone more worthy of Earth, though he couldn’t decide who that would be, just yet. He paced around the spacious office, peering out the large window down at Earth. Clarke.   
He had agonized over her since the moment Thelonious had told him he had sent the 100, including Clarke. She left to her possible death never knowing the truth. Never knowing that Wells would have floated himself before selling out Jake Griffin. Jake was more of a father to Wells than Thelonious ever was, and more importantly, he was Clarke’s world. He can see how Clarke assumed that it was him, that is was Wells who went and told Thelonious that Jake had discovered a flaw in the Ark. But it wasn’t. And Wells knows exactly who it was. He was startled out of his thoughts by more rapping on the door. However, this sounded different. This wasn’t another poor family from factory station begging for a spot on a ship, or a rich family from Alpha promising a vote for Thelonious on the ground, it was something different.  
Wells opened the door to see the Sheppard family standing in front of him with what appeared to be a lost infant. They looked at him urgently and he welcomed them inside, closing the door behind them. He remembered Alex Sheppard from Clarke’s days interning in the infirmary. If he remembers correctly, he was the only one there who showed her any kindness, or was willing to treat her like someone other than Abbigail Griffin’s daughter.  
“Alex, Mrs. Sheppard, so good to see you. What’s going on?” Wells motioned to the olive toned baby, with dark hair and dark eyes, that was very clearly not a creation of the blonde haired blue eyed couple standing before him.  
“Wells, honey. You might want to sit down.”  
*

Wells came barging through the corridors of Alpha station, his daughter in his arms. His daughter, he thought. Upon hearing this news, much to everyone’s surprise, his own included, Wells was overcome with love. He peered down at her face as saw his own; saw Clarke.   
But now things were different. They were leaving for Earth tomorrow. He couldn’t guarantee anything for the incredible couple who took in his daughter and raised her as their own for the past twelve weeks, but he could and would get his daughter, his Nova, as he had learned, to the ground safely.   
Wells opened the doors to a room filled with a long oak table he was very familiar with. This table was from the White House, and once held meetings between various leaders from around the world. Not dissimilar from what he was seeing here. He saw his father at the head of the Table, flanked by Marcus Kane and Diana Sydney. He had plenty of words for each of them, but right now he needed to speak to a certain chief of surgery.  
Wells eyes landed on Abby, who looked up at him, back down at her tablet, then shot up to him again. Perhaps it was the tiny girl resting her head on Wells’ shoulder that caught her attention. She shot up from her chair and headed quickly over to where Wells’ stood, and began to usher him out the door, but not before Thelonious slowly rose from his seat, looking questioningly at his son, the chancellor tried to speak, but before he could say a word, Abby and Wells had exited the room, and walked a few yards down the corridor before speaking.  
Wells first, “You knew.” It was more of statement than a question.  
“Wells, you have to believe me, I didn’t.” he looked at her in a manner as if to say he was not in the mood to be lied to. “Okay, yes. I knew there was a child, but she told me…” she paused and looked around, and spoke again, much queiter this time, “She told me she had it ‘taken care of’” Abby quoted what her daughter had indeed told her, “She told me the day she was headed for solitary, the last minute I saw her and the aftermath of a surgery that she didn’t want the child to live in this world, and that she knew someone on factory who could..” Wells nodded, knowing what she was going to say next.  
“Well, Abby, it doesn’t matter whether you knew or not, because there is something more important I need you to know.”  
She paused, allowing him to continue.  
“I never knew about this child. I had no idea that Clarke was even pregnant. She hasn’t spoken to me since Jake was sentenced. Abby… She thinks I did it. She thinks I told my father.”  
“That’s ridiculous Wells, how could you have known.”  
Wells swallowed hard, shifting his sleeping daughter in his arms, “We’d known for almost a year, Abby.”  
Abby thought that over, “Okay, so just tell her you didn’t do it.”  
“It’s not that easy and you know it, Abby. I thought I could take this one. I would let her believe it was me so she didn’t lose both her parents. Abby, don’t play coy with me. I know it was you who told my father about Jake. You need to tell Clarke the truth. I won’t lie so Clarke can have one parent, if that means my daughter won’t have hers.”  
Abby looked sullen. Wells came to this prepared for a battle, but it seems the weight of what she had done had weighed on her more heavily than Wells ever would have known.   
“I’ll do it. I’ll tell her. Just… could I hold her, Wells?”  
He considered it for a moment. If they all made it to the ground, he wanted there to be a modicum of peace between them all, maybe this was the start.  
He handed Nova over to her Grandmother.   
She peered fondly down at the little girl, and stroked her hair, “what’s her name?”  
Wells breathed in to speak but before the words could come out a violent shake rocked the ship, he grabbed Nova from Abby’s arms and held her tightly against him. The lights flickered on and off a few times before sirens began blaring.  
He knew the true chaos was about to begin and he wasn’t about to have his daughter in the middle of it. For the first time in his life he was happy to abuse his privilege as the chancellors son, and ran to get his daughter to safety, filling one of the first spots on the first drop ship. He looked to Abby to lead the way.  
*  
“Prepare for impact” an automated voice played over the intercom of the drop ship.   
“prepare for impact” I’m coming, Clarke.  
“prepare for impact” Wells looked down at his daughter. We’re coming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and Comments are my life-blood.  
> find me on tumblr @ autumnessprime


	7. if that mockingbird won't sing

Clarke wandered around the opening frantically, scanning the remnant of fallen spacecraft and huddled families for Wells. Bellamy followed close behind her, just as vigilant. Clarke’s body ached from the search, her limbs burned and muscles aching, the smell of oil clogging her nose. Tear began to form in her eyes as she feared that she wouldn’t find them – or worse, find them among the dead.  
“Clarke!” Someone yelled in the distance. She immediately grabbed Bellamy’s hand suddenly paralyzed, although every fiber in her body instinctually drove her to find her baby, now the thought of seeing her for the first time in three months felt almost too daunting a task to bear.   
The voice called her name again and the confusing swell of terror and relief consumed her as she realized the voice did not belong to Wells, but her mother.  
“Mom?” Clarke called back.   
“Clarke, my god, you’re here.” Abby embraced her, and she felt her mother’s chest heave with shaky breathes.   
She didn’t want to cut this reunion short, and as happy as Clarke was to see her mother was well, she couldn’t allow it to last any longer, there would be time for this later.  
“Mom,” Clarke grabbed Abby by the shoulders so she would look her right in the eyes, there was no time for miscommunications. “Where is Wells?”  
A look of grief passed over Abby’s face and Clarke felt the blood leave her body.  
“Clarke there is something I have to tell you.”  
“No,” Clarke muttered, feeling herself loose balance, “no, mom no…” tears filled Clarke’s eyes as she began to lose control. Bellamy grabbed her around her waist, suddenly supporting her wait in his arms.   
Before Clarke could succumb to the hysterics building her body, her mother shook her head,  
“Clarke he is okay. So is the baby.” As Abby spoke another unfamiliar and confusing cocktail of emotions flooded over Clarke, she had been on an emotional rollercoaster so far tonight and it didn’t seem to ease up at all as she began to grasp the fact that her best friend and daughter were alive, but that her mother had met her daughter.   
Of course she had, Clarke realized, Wells had her before the dropships left, and there was no way around truth, there. That little girl certainly took after her father the last time Clarke had seen her.  
“But, Clarke, before you go, please listen,” Abby began before Clarke heard her name again, this time, it was Wells.  
Wells approached, and from a distance she saw a look of relief cross his face, but as he neared that look morphed. She saw his eyes dart to Bellamy’s arms around her center, still supporting her through it all.  
She heard her daughter before she saw her, screaming in Wells arms. She never thought the sound of a baby crying could sound so sweet. Clarke surged forward, out of Bellamy’s grasp, toward were Wells stood, just feet from Abby, Bellamy and herself.  
She looked into Wells eyes. This was the first time they had all been together in her daughter’s life. Clarke gave him a small smile, but in the back of her mind, as much as she wished it wasn’t, was the memory of what he had done.  
He was the reason her father was dead, but also the reason their daughter was alive. A life for life. She supposed that evened out as she reached for the bundle in his arms.  
“Shh, baby girl, mommy’s here” she bounced her daughter in her arms letting the tears fall freely from her eyes now. Wells looked softly at her.  
She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up to Bellamy who was smiling down at the tiny baby in her arms, slowly being soothed by her mother. She glanced back up to Wells, who had an angry look in his eyes, which, at first, she was sure was no doubt aimed at Bellamy, but she quickly realized was directed at her mother.   
After a few hours everyone who had survived the landing was gathered in the small camp the hundred had fashioned for themselves. Clarke stood in the infirmary, having dealt with most of the injuries so far, at least the major ones, as she rocked her daughter, nursing in her arms, humming softly.  
Since landing, Clarke never gave up hope that she would see her daughter soon and had painstakingly maintained her milk supply, hand expressing every hour, ensuring that her daughter wouldn’t make it all the way to Earth, just to have nothing to eat. The nights of agony now paid off as her daughter’s deep brown eyes fluttered shut, appetite sated.   
Clarke heard some shuffling; she looked up to find her Bellamy fondly gazing back at her, leaning in the doorway, looking effortlessly handsome.   
She shyly smiled back at him.  
“That’s a good look for you.” He mused.  
She laughed softly at the absurdity. She hadn’t been able to catch her reflection recently but she was certain she was covered in blood, sweat and soot. Her hair had certainly taken a beating and she was sure she looked like a – well, like someone who just sifted through burning wreckage for hours. Not that she had put any thought into her appearance on this particular day.   
“No really,” he continued as he sauntered over to her, sitting beside her on the exam table, peering down at her daughter, “your glowing.” He smirked.  
Bellamy reached out to caress Nova’s curls softly, “She’s even more beautiful than you described.”  
“Well, she was a little swollen last time I saw her.” Clarke smirked back at him, not nearly as toe-curling as him, she could only assume.  
“I hear it’s your birthday.” He continued, not looking up from the sleeping baby. She was suddenly aware of his proximity, and leaned into his shoulder. Utterly exhausted from the day.  
“Yeah, I guess it is.”  
“I would say I wished I had gotten you something, but I’m not sure I could have thought of something to top this,” he motioned with his head to Nova.  
Clarke laughed. No, he couldn’t have. Her daughter safe in her arms is all she could have ever hoped for. It occurred to her again, she has Wells to thank for it.  
As if on cue, Bellamy spoke, “Jaha didn’t seem too thrilled to see… well you know, us…” his voice shook slightly.  
“Bellamy Blake, if I didn’t know you better I’d say you sound nervous.”  
“Well, no” he denied laughing, “Not about him, but maybe about…” he drawled off, Clarke re-positioned so she could make eye contact, “About what?”   
“About, well, what we are. I mean, I don’t want to put this on you now, I know you have so much on your plate, but” Clarke’s face split into a big grin, “Are you asking me to be your girlfriend?”  
“Well, I did just see your entire rack just now, and I feel it would be stupid if I didn’t.”  
Clarke scoffed and bumped his shoulder with hers, “But yeah, in all this craziness, if you wouldn’t mind… just, going through it by my side?”   
“It would be my pleasure.”  
Bellamy leaned over and gently held her face as he pressed his lips to hers. As right as it felt, she was reminded of the weight in her arms. Her ties to another life.   
“Bellamy, I am not saying I don’t want this” Clarke pulled away as she spoke, “I’m just saying it’s not going to be easy, I have a daughter.”  
“I know that, and I wouldn’t want to step in where I’m not wanted, but if you want this, I promise you I will protect her like she was my own.” Clarke felt warmth spread all over her.   
In the midst of the tragedy that surrounded them, she found momentary comfort in this little cabin, with the one person she loved most in the world and the man she was growing the find quite likable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!   
> find me @ autumnessprime on tumblr.


	8. Thin Lines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Wells don't see eye to eye.

Clarke blinked her eyes open for what had to be the 20th time that night. Her daughter was not the greatest sleeper in the world. She absentmindedly reminded herself to give both Alex and Sara big hugs the next time she saw them. She meekly followed the sound of crying in the dim morning light of her cabin to find Bellamy holding her fussing daughter in his arms, sitting in the wooden chair in her room. After they left the cabin last night he insisted in staying in her cabin to look over Nova and herself, and no matter how many times she insisted he get his butt into bed with her he retaliated saying she was too vulnerable and needed a night to think things over.  
  
She marveled momentarily at the sight in front of her, her baby girl in Bellamy Blake’s arms. He must have heard her earlier and got to her before her crying woke Clarke, allowing her maybe a full two hours of uninterrupted sleep. She thought about the night they shared a few days back. She thought about what would have happened if she had remembered to shut off the light. What would have happened if Bellamy hadn’t seen her scar, and had simply had her and moved on to the next girl. Would they be where they are now? Would they have found their way back to each other?  
  
She shook the thoughts away, as they didn’t matter now, and tried to gently pry Nova from Bellamy’s sleeping arms. Unfortunately it woke Bellamy and he stood violently, knocking the chair he had been sitting in, over in the process. Clarke reached out to soothe him, “Its’ okay Bell, its’ just me.”  
  
That seemed to knock him out of his trance, as he extended Nova out to Clarke, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to, uh,” he rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed, “It’s okay” Clarke assured him with a smirk, “you were just protecting our little princess here, huh?” Clarke looked down at Nova, blinking her big pretty eyes back at Clarke, “The dragon was just protecting you while you were sleeping, huh?” Clarke winked at Bellamy.  
  
There was a knock on her cabin door, and she looked to Bellamy briefly before walking over to open it. She pulled the door open to find Wells standing in her doorway. He looked just as he had the last time she saw him. The same look of defeat on his face.  
“Good morning, Clarke,” Wells looked past her, “Bellamy.” Bellamy nodded.  
  
“Good morning, Wells.”  
  
“I was uh… I just…” He stammered awkwardly, shifting around. Clarke had never seen him like this. He usually exuded confidence.  
  
“Wells, would you like to come in?” Clarke offered, he looked apprehensive.  
  
“I was just leaving.” Bellamy announced, pulling on his boots before walking out. Clarke was grateful, until he stooped to drop a kiss on her head as he walked past Wells out the door way.  
  
“Well. You two are cozy.” Wells suddenly spoke, coldly.  
  
“Yeah, I suppose we are.” Clarke replied, as she shut the door behind him. He walked to the overturned chair, and set it up right before relaxing down onto it, across from where Clarke had sat on her bed, Nova outstretched on her back, playing with her feet beside Clarke.  
“We have a lot to talk about.” Wells began. There was that confidence, Clarke thought.  
  
She nodded.  
  
“So. She’s mine?”  
  
Clarke tried her best not to be insulted. “Yes, Wells. She is your daughter.”  
“But… it was just one time.”  
  
Clarke laughed, “Didn’t you pay attention in biology, it only takes once.”  
  
Wells sort of laughed at that too.  
  
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” She whispered, not taking her eyes off Nova. It was easier if she didn’t have to see the look of hurt in Wells’.  
  
He just sighed.  
  
“I didn’t know until I was four months along. You have to understand… I was still grieving from my dad, I couldn’t just…”  
  
“No. I never would have suggested you would. I would have wanted you to keep her. You know, if that’s what you wanted.”  
  
This time Clarke sighed, and smiled at him, “I know, Wells. I know you would have wanted her.”  
  
“want.” He corrected.  
  
“what?” Clarke replied.  
  
“Want, not wanted. I do want her, Clarke. She’s my daughter.”  
  
Suddenly Clarke felt very possessive of the girl beside her, putting her toes in her little mouth.  
  
“Well, unfortunately Wells, that’s a privilege that I think might need to be earned.”  
  
“I have earned it.” He spoke, raising his voice a little. “I’m the one who kept her alive, who got her here, if you don’t remember. Also, I’m her father.”  
  
“You may be the reason she’s here, but not everybody who had their life in your hands was so lucky, Wells!” Clarke cried out.  
  
“I didn’t kill your father, Clarke!” Wells stood now, “I didn’t want it to be like this, but I’m done, I’m not letting this shit get between me and Nova.” Clarke stared at him silently, tears streaming from her eyes. “It wasn’t me, Clarke.”  
  
She just looked away. She couldn’t believe it. Of course Wells would want to be a part of his daughter’s life. But to lie about this was just too much for her to bear. She shook her head solemnly.  
  
She let out a heavy breath and looked into his eyes, there was that look again, utter defeat. She scooped Nova up in her arms and walked out of the cabin, she looked back to Wells to say something – anything. But nothing could be articulated, nothing could be said for how it felt to look at your best friend, the father of your child and feel totally lost.


End file.
